To all Moms out there, Happy Mother’s Day! Today is your day to relax and be pampered by your children and receive wonderful cards chosen just for you after hours of thoughtful searching in the Hallmark section. Okay, so maybe reality strikes again and Mother’s Day doesn’t always fit the Hallmark perfect picture of family bliss. So, give yourself that perfect Mother’s Day gift - the gift of forgiveness.

Here are a few things you may need to forgive yourself for:

1. You are not Super Mom - I’ve yet to meet Super Mom, although I have encountered a number of women making themselves absolutely crazy trying to gain this title. When you’ve been in the game as long as I have you know there is no such thing. We do the best we can, given all the stressors that get thrown our way on any given day. Give yourself permission to know you are not the best Mom in the world, but you are certainly not the worst. You’ve done your best to give your kids what they need to succeed in life. Motherhood is not an extreme sport.

2. You have never been able to achieve the work-life balance  - If anyone had the answer to the age old question, “How do I achieve work-life balance,” they’d be millionaires no longer worrying about such trival things because they would have a full staff of people to look after them. There are many books, articles, videos and other bits of advice out there to help you achieve work-life balance. Almost all offer the same advice:
-Find good childcare.
-Forget the guilt.
-Divide household chores and childcare fairly with your partner.
-Be in the moment whether at home or work.
-Lower housework on your list of priorities.
-Manage your time effectively at home and at work.
All easily said, not so easily accomplished. Personally, I think the secret to work-life balance is different for everyone. You just have to find what fits for your family and realize that perfect balance is a myth.

3. You have not always made the right work-life choices - We can all play the “what if” game. We make choices and know they have consequences. It is always easier to see what we might have done once some time has passed and we see how things have developed. You make the best decisions you can with the information you have at the time. Leave your regrets in the past, they have no place in your future.

4. You don’t have it all - Does anyone you know have it all? It may appear on the surface that some people are balancing work, home, personal time, relationships all better than you, but I think if we were all honest we’d admit that none of us has achieved “it all”. The trick may be to focus on what needs your attention at the time and give ‘it’ your all. That may mean devoting the time to your kids when they are young or really need you and another time in your life working on upgrading your education if needed for the next promotion at work. We don’t need to “have it all” everyday. Perhaps looking at balance over our lifetime would be more realistic.

So this Mother’s Day give yourself the gift of forgiveness. Sit back and think about how lucky you are to have your children, your career, your relationships, etc. Forgive yourself. Be happy in this moment at this time. Leave all the guilt, regret, wonderment of work-life balance for another day. Today is your day. Enjoy!