In Saturday’s Star there was an article written by Donna Nebenzahl entitled “Working Women: Don’t take it personally.” The article talked about a book, The Male Factor, written by Shaunti Feldhahn.

In the article, Nebenzahl reveals that Feldhahn surveyed 3,000 men and asked for their honest anonymous thoughts on workplace interactions. The survey results paint a picture of how misconceptions develop in the workplace.

The articles reflects on the unwritten rules of the workplace and recommends that workers not take things too personally, do what’s in the best interest of the company, don’t make business decisions based on personal factors, be able to do business regardless of personal factors and only show emotion that is related to the business.

Feldhahn offers up Three Golden Rules and suggests that being aware of these rules will make it easier for female employees to deal effectively with male bosses or colleagues:

1. Get to the point. Men want to hear the details only after the main point is made.

2. Don’t overreact.

3. Let it go. Don’t hold a grudge.

I expect this is good advice for both men and women in the workplace. I do wonder just from reading The Star article how many of the misconceptions that develop in the workplace could be avoided if men and women learned to communicate better and understand each others unique communication skills. I’m not sure it is about women learning how to communicate to men or men learning to communicate to women, but rather being respectful of our communication differences and recognizing that diversity of thought and the different ways we look at situations is a positive step toward better decision making.