One of the most often heard complaints from women working in a male-dominated industry is that they simply are not being heard. Women comment that they can come up with an idea in a meeting, express it and it gets no uptake until a man offers up the same idea and then he gets credit for it. I have been thinking a lot about why this happens lately and some training I’ve been taking is opening up a window of understanding to this very phenomenon.

I’ve been fortunate enough to participate in a training program by The Humphrey Group, Taking the Stage®, which provides women with the opportunity to look specifically at how they present themselves to determine if they are taking on the role of a leader.

One of the things we have been discussing is the language we use in meetings, in our email and even our voice mail message. Women often don’t express their ideas directly and try to soften the impact of their message. It is how we are programmed from an early age and it is a difficult thing to try and correct. Judith Humphrey, President of The Humphrey Group says, “using verbs like “I think,” “I will attempt to”, I’m not sure” or using the past tense, “What I wanted to talk about today…”  weakens your message.”

Think about the messaging you use in your day-to-day work life. Do you apologize in your voice mail for not being at your desk? If you do, record another message. You are busy working and you shouldn’t apologize for that.

Give yourself permission to take on the character of a leader. Use strong language to get that idea across in meetings. Use “I am convinced”, “we must” or “my point is”. Follow that statement with three reasons why it is the right thing to do and I believe you will see a difference in how you are being heard in meetings. In other words 'own your idea' and you won’t open the door for anyone else in the morning to take your idea and market it as their own.